W hen you read this title, did you think that I might be enjoying a little tequila as I wrote? If so, I'm sorry to say that that was not quite the case. But it's probably fair to say that I am drunk on Spain, where I recently spent two weeks visiting my daughter who is enrolled in a study-abroad program there.

My daughter's extended stay in the country turned out to be particularly helpful because she was able to provide useful hints on the culture that one gets only by living in a given location. She had also taken the time to compose for me a list of useful words for getting around, and all of the words that I included in the title above were contained in her list.

I belong to the group of people who just love to travel. When I am traveling, I find that my sense of the surrounding environment is heightened. In fact, I find that I have to be "on" all the time, especially when I am traveling in a country in which people speak a different language. I have to be "on" to avoid getting lost, sometimes to avoid being swindled, to take in the surrounding environment, including architecture and culture, to read both the signs and the people, to revel in the moment, and to live the full experience of being in a new place.

Traveling offers some of the most intense opportunities to create shared memories, and many incidents, while unpleasant when they occur, morph into either memorable occurrences or useful lessons. I sometimes think that I am perhaps most alive when I am traveling.

The story I am about to share with you happened very early in the morning, when, truth be told, no one in our travel party was very much awake. We were taking a 6:30 a.m. flight to Barcelona. The departure time of this flight was a bad choice on my part, because it meant we had to be up in the wee hours of the morning in order to reach the airport in time.

We boarded the plane, settled into our seats and were sitting, motionless or, it's fair to say, somewhat listless, trying to catch up on some sleep. I should also mention that I had magnanimously traded my aisle seat for my daughter's middle seat.

It was in this state of very early morning, sleep-deprived near-stupor that I heard my daughter say to the gentleman in the seat in front of her, in English, "No, sir, I am not."

It turned out that the couple seated in the row ahead of us were Americans. We had been sitting quietly, and not talking, as the couple arrived and took their seats, so, for all intents and purposes, the couple had no way of knowing if we spoke only Spanish.

It turned out that the gentleman had taken his seat, turned to my daughter, and immediately accused her of bumping his seat. His exact words were, "Stop hitting my seat!" My daughter was engaged in no such behavior. Being quite polite and mild-mannered, she would not have behaved this way. What upset her, though, was that instead of inquiring, he accused her, with full, ringing conviction.

The truth was that this gentleman was very tall, the seats were very tightly spaced, and he likely interpreted every motion as being pushed from behind, which was not the case.

Although my daughter denied the accusation, the gentleman repeatedly and with increasing frequency turned back to address my daughter. She was sitting quite still, not moving at all, so his accusations were clearly for naught, but he was convinced he was right.

Clearly, my "magnanimous act of trading the aisle seat" was not helping my daughter get any sleep. So I offered to change the seat back, which made my daughter very happy.

Once I was seated in the aisle seat, the same gentleman turned to me and inquired if I, too, would be "continuing this throughout the flight?"

I must admit, I was a bit more assertive in responding to his accusation. I politely invited him to focus on his own space and stop bothering me. I also preemptively decided to notify the flight attendant of his complaints, showcasing that we were really not doing anything to affect his "seat enjoyment."

Is this starting to sound more like an environment in some community associations? By talking to the flight attendant, in effect, I put the board and the management company on notice in an effort to protect me from any of this gentleman's future allegations. He tried to follow suit, but our "notice complaint" received more mileage because we lodged ours in Spanish, while he lodged his in English. Our complaints were met with assurances, while his received polite, but dismissive smiles.

Thankfully, our flight was only an hour in duration, so we did not have to suffer long. When it was time to disembark, we decided to let the couple in the row ahead of us deplane first. I should note here the tail area door of the plane was being used as an exit, so all passengers had to turn and walk toward the back of the plane.

Although our party was well aware of this gentleman's irritation, most of the other passengers who were seated near us were blissfully unaware of his unhappiness. But as other people stood and moved into the aisle, this same man tried to move backward—over those people standing in the aisle—to retrieve his luggage from the overhead compartment. The space was very limited, and he had a hard time advancing.

He was trying to be polite, I suppose, because he addressed the young woman standing in front of him by saying, "Excuse me." But it was clear that this young woman did not speak English, because she did not react at all to his request. It appeared to us that she was completely oblivious of his presence. In a state of schadenfreude delight, we watched as this man repeated his "Excuse me" several times, each time using a louder voice and an angrier tone, but all to no avail. He was bordering on screaming, but still the young woman appeared not to have the faintest clue that she was being addressed. Meanwhile, the man was getting more and more aggravated. I could tell that this probably was not the first incident of the kind he had experienced in Spain, and he probably could not wait to get out of the country.

I'll never know this man's name, and I am sure that if he were retelling this story, it would be an entirely different tale. But there are at least two sides to each story. As I reflected on it later, the whole matter made me think of community association living on so many levels, including:

• The man made an accusation without first attempting to investigate the issue with a polite inquiry. I assure you that our disposition toward him would have been much more amicable had he spared us the accusation. Had he been more reasonable in his approach, we would not have felt it necessary to involve the flight attendants. In community associations, neighbors often heap accusations on one another without first trying to delve deeper into the problem in an attempt to solve it.

• We resorted to preemptively involving the flight attendants, mirroring a community association turning to effective third parties, such as boards and management companies to resolve disputes.

• The gentleman traveled to Spain without making an attempt to learn basic words, such aspor favor and gracias. This fact reminds me of people who move into community associations without taking the time to read the association documents so they are familiar with the basics of community association living that will apply to them. • I had consulted my daughter and other sources on travel and getting around in Spain, which helped me set realistic expectations. Many community association owners and residents would similarly benefit from seeking additional information about their association prior to moving in.

All in all, I loved Spain, and I would recommend it as a travel destination, with the proviso that it helps to at least know some rudimentary words in Spanish. As for the words that I included in the title of this column, they might as well be the manifesto of a very laid back and agreeable culture, where things are good (Vale, the v is pronounced as a b), nothing (implies bad) has happened (No Pasa Nada), and people are routinely reminded to chill out and relax (Tranquila). I similarly recommend informed community association living. In this case, that translates to an attempt to speak the association's language by knowing your responsibilities and obligations as specified by the association documents.

Most associations would surely benefit from maintaining an attitude of Vale, No Pasa Nada y Tranquila. With a little knowledge and that attitude, a condo owner can surely enjoy community association living, just as we enjoyed our trip to Spain.

W hen you read this title, did you think that I might be enjoying a little tequila as I wrote? If so, I'm sorry to say that that was not quite the case. But it's probably fair to say that I am drunk on Spain, where I recently spent two weeks visiting my daughter who is enrolled in a study-abroad program there.

My daughter's extended stay in the country turned out to be particularly helpful because she was able to provide useful hints on the culture that one gets only by living in a given location. She had also taken the time to compose for me a list of useful words for getting around, and all of the words that I included in the title above were contained in her list.

I belong to the group of people who just love to travel. When I am traveling, I find that my sense of the surrounding environment is heightened. In fact, I find that I have to be "on" all the time, especially when I am traveling in a country in which people speak a different language. I have to be "on" to avoid getting lost, sometimes to avoid being swindled, to take in the surrounding environment, including architecture and culture, to read both the signs and the people, to revel in the moment, and to live the full experience of being in a new place.

Traveling offers some of the most intense opportunities to create shared memories, and many incidents, while unpleasant when they occur, morph into either memorable occurrences or useful lessons. I sometimes think that I am perhaps most alive when I am traveling.

The story I am about to share with you happened very early in the morning, when, truth be told, no one in our travel party was very much awake. We were taking a 6:30 a.m. flight to Barcelona. The departure time of this flight was a bad choice on my part, because it meant we had to be up in the wee hours of the morning in order to reach the airport in time.

We boarded the plane, settled into our seats and were sitting, motionless or, it's fair to say, somewhat listless, trying to catch up on some sleep. I should also mention that I had magnanimously traded my aisle seat for my daughter's middle seat.

It was in this state of very early morning, sleep-deprived near-stupor that I heard my daughter say to the gentleman in the seat in front of her, in English, "No, sir, I am not."

It turned out that the couple seated in the row ahead of us were Americans. We had been sitting quietly, and not talking, as the couple arrived and took their seats, so, for all intents and purposes, the couple had no way of knowing if we spoke only Spanish.

It turned out that the gentleman had taken his seat, turned to my daughter, and immediately accused her of bumping his seat. His exact words were, "Stop hitting my seat!" My daughter was engaged in no such behavior. Being quite polite and mild-mannered, she would not have behaved this way. What upset her, though, was that instead of inquiring, he accused her, with full, ringing conviction.

The truth was that this gentleman was very tall, the seats were very tightly spaced, and he likely interpreted every motion as being pushed from behind, which was not the case.

Although my daughter denied the accusation, the gentleman repeatedly and with increasing frequency turned back to address my daughter. She was sitting quite still, not moving at all, so his accusations were clearly for naught, but he was convinced he was right.

Clearly, my "magnanimous act of trading the aisle seat" was not helping my daughter get any sleep. So I offered to change the seat back, which made my daughter very happy.

Once I was seated in the aisle seat, the same gentleman turned to me and inquired if I, too, would be "continuing this throughout the flight?"

I must admit, I was a bit more assertive in responding to his accusation. I politely invited him to focus on his own space and stop bothering me. I also preemptively decided to notify the flight attendant of his complaints, showcasing that we were really not doing anything to affect his "seat enjoyment."

Is this starting to sound more like an environment in some community associations? By talking to the flight attendant, in effect, I put the board and the management company on notice in an effort to protect me from any of this gentleman's future allegations. He tried to follow suit, but our "notice complaint" received more mileage because we lodged ours in Spanish, while he lodged his in English. Our complaints were met with assurances, while his received polite, but dismissive smiles.

Thankfully, our flight was only an hour in duration, so we did not have to suffer long. When it was time to disembark, we decided to let the couple in the row ahead of us deplane first. I should note here the tail area door of the plane was being used as an exit, so all passengers had to turn and walk toward the back of the plane.

Although our party was well aware of this gentleman's irritation, most of the other passengers who were seated near us were blissfully unaware of his unhappiness. But as other people stood and moved into the aisle, this same man tried to move backward—over those people standing in the aisle—to retrieve his luggage from the overhead compartment. The space was very limited, and he had a hard time advancing.

He was trying to be polite, I suppose, because he addressed the young woman standing in front of him by saying, "Excuse me." But it was clear that this young woman did not speak English, because she did not react at all to his request. It appeared to us that she was completely oblivious of his presence. In a state of schadenfreude delight, we watched as this man repeated his "Excuse me" several times, each time using a louder voice and an angrier tone, but all to no avail. He was bordering on screaming, but still the young woman appeared not to have the faintest clue that she was being addressed. Meanwhile, the man was getting more and more aggravated. I could tell that this probably was not the first incident of the kind he had experienced in Spain, and he probably could not wait to get out of the country.

I'll never know this man's name, and I am sure that if he were retelling this story, it would be an entirely different tale. But there are at least two sides to each story. As I reflected on it later, the whole matter made me think of community association living on so many levels, including:

• The man made an accusation without first attempting to investigate the issue with a polite inquiry. I assure you that our disposition toward him would have been much more amicable had he spared us the accusation. Had he been more reasonable in his approach, we would not have felt it necessary to involve the flight attendants. In community associations, neighbors often heap accusations on one another without first trying to delve deeper into the problem in an attempt to solve it.

• We resorted to preemptively involving the flight attendants, mirroring a community association turning to effective third parties, such as boards and management companies to resolve disputes.

• The gentleman traveled to Spain without making an attempt to learn basic words, such aspor favor and gracias. This fact reminds me of people who move into community associations without taking the time to read the association documents so they are familiar with the basics of community association living that will apply to them. • I had consulted my daughter and other sources on travel and getting around in Spain, which helped me set realistic expectations. Many community association owners and residents would similarly benefit from seeking additional information about their association prior to moving in.

All in all, I loved Spain, and I would recommend it as a travel destination, with the proviso that it helps to at least know some rudimentary words in Spanish. As for the words that I included in the title of this column, they might as well be the manifesto of a very laid back and agreeable culture, where things are good (Vale, the v is pronounced as a b), nothing (implies bad) has happened (No Pasa Nada), and people are routinely reminded to chill out and relax (Tranquila). I similarly recommend informed community association living. In this case, that translates to an attempt to speak the association's language by knowing your responsibilities and obligations as specified by the association documents.

Most associations would surely benefit from maintaining an attitude of Vale, No Pasa Nada y Tranquila. With a little knowledge and that attitude, a condo owner can surely enjoy community association living, just as we enjoyed our trip to Spain.